A Stroke of Luck
by Jini
Summary: AU. In which Riku is an expert cock-blocker, Kairi is frustrated as hell and Roxas can’t ever seem to get lucky. Getting laid is harder than you think. Roxiri.


Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts.

Summary: In which Riku is an expert cock-blocker, Kairi is frustrated as hell and Roxas can't ever seem to get lucky. Getting laid is harder than you think.

Author's Note: A request fic for **SylverEyes** on LJ. This fic is AU by the way, so some characters might be a little OOC. Also, be advised there is some mature content ahead.

Enjoy the crack :)

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**A Stroke of Luck**

**Prompt: **Naughty Games/Role Play

* * *

When Roxas met Kairi, it was at a bar.

He'd just lost his job, was—quite possibly—about to be kicked out of his apartment for failing to pay rent (again), and to make matters worse, he was touching twenty and he had yet to find a steady girlfriend.

He'd never even been kissed—it was so pathetic.

Well, no, that was sort of a lie. He'd kissed this girl Olette once.

Well, it was more like he tripped and _fell_ on her, but he counted it anyway. Shame she had a beast for boyfriend (some hot-shot named Seifer)—needless to say, he didn't take too kindly in finding his girlfriend smacked-lipped with some other guy—but she was pretty cute though.

Things were looking quite bad for his financial life—but it was his romantic life he was more concerned about. A job? He could find one easily. Another apartment? That was easy too. But getting laid? Nope, not that easy at all.

But he was determined. He just had to find the right girl.

That's when he saw her. Sitting several stools away from where he was—long, red hair; rosy cheeks and pink lips; soft, flawless skin and smooth, long legs (he had to wipe the corner of his mouth to prevent the drool from dripping out of it)—was definitely the right girl he'd been dreaming about.

Now, Roxas didn't favour himself a romanticist of any sort—he was poor on the uptake as it was and he sure as hell didn't believe in that 'love at first sight' crap—but he was thoroughly convinced that he'd found himself The One.

She was just _perfect_. She was beautiful. And he'd rather liked her legs. They were smooth and seemed to go on forever. He could imagine running his hands up and down those legs and then wrapping them around to fit his waist—yeah, that would be _hot_. But Roxas was a gentleman—if nothing else, he was practical, and he didn't think it was proper mannerisms to ogle a girl he hardly even knew, let alone have not-so-innocent thoughts about her modesty. That just wasn't right.

So new plan, he thought, encouraged. Introduction, date and then get laid. He always fancied himself a traditionalist on the subject of courtship, but maybe this was a little too old-fashion, even for him. Or maybe, he thought, after the intro, they could just skip onto the getting laid part and then date later. Yeah. That sounded much better.

Then again—and this was the part where reality usually kicked its ugly head back in—with his luck, he would probably be getting neither.

The last girl he'd tried to woo into dating him (or sleeping with him, whichever was first)—a pretty, blonde girl by the name of Namine—winded up sleeping with his _brother_, Sora, instead. Yeah, the irony, right?

Who am I kidding? He thought with a dreary sigh. I might as well call it quits now. A beautiful girl like that would never fall for a guy like _me_.

Roxas sighed, accepted his defeat and ordered another drink. It was worth a try though, even if it was short. He was going to miss those legs.

He felt a tap on his shoulder. When he turned around, he nearly choked on his beer. It was _her_.

"Hello," she said with a smile.

"Hi," he said, because he didn't know quite else what to say.

Was he dreaming? Had all the alcohol sunk into his system already? What was she even _doing_ here? He wondered. Maybe she needs to find the bathroom? Most girls, when they saw him, either asked him where the bathroom was or mistakened him to be a waiter. He was such an expert on giving directions to the girls' lavatory.

"Um," he said, a little unsure because she was still standing there and she hadn't uttered a word about toilets yet, "can I, uh, help you with something?"

"I saw you watching me earlier," she said simply.

Come again? "What?"

"I said I saw you watching me earlier," she repeated.

Oh _shit_. "I-I'm sorry, but don't know what you mean," he said, trying to sound casual.

"You were watching me," she said, knowingly. "You kept staring at my legs."

Oh, my God. The need to burst out and apologize was overwhelming. I'm sorry! He wanted to say. I'm sorry for gawking at your legs when they're so goddamn long and smooth and inviting and practically begging for me to run my hands over it.

Luckily, he kept his mouth shut. Instead, his shoulders tensed and he held his breath. He waited for the moment when she'd smack him and call him a disgusting pervert, but it never came.

Her smile, if anything, only got wider. "My name's Kairi," she said, extending her hand out to him.

He was amazed, but he supposed anything was better than the other option.

"Roxas," he said, taking her hand and shaking it.

Her smile was absolutely stunning. He could barely believe this was happening.

"Nice to meet you," she said.

"Likewise."

Maybe his luck had finally changed.

They'd gotten along just swimmingly. He was astounded he could actually maintain a decent level of conversation with her without making a complete fool of himself, especially when she'd keep smiling that wonderful way at him which, on several occasions, had managed to make him lose track of his thoughts. And she'd laughed at all his jokes—Sora claimed they weren't anything to laugh about, let alone be told to the generalized public—and she touched his arm and had drinks with him.

And then it got even better: she kissed him. He didn't have to fall for that to happen—midway while he was talking, she'd leaned into him and pressed her lips to his. At first, he could barely compute what was happening—he could hardly hear over sound of ringing in his ears—and then he thought his brain might have officially malfunctioned because he couldn't register a thing—he didn't even think he was _breathing _anymore. But then her mouth began to move from under his, slowly and questing, a little shy and yet boldly, and it was like instinct; like it was the most natural thing in the world—and he started kissing her back.

He always figured he'd be a lousy kisser, having no experience on the matter, but he'd kept time with her movements—when she moved, he moved; when she slipped her arms around his neck, his moved his to encircle her waist; when she wanted tongue, he gave her tongue—and not once had he slobbered all over her.

And when she whispered, "Let's go to your place" Roxas could hardly believe his luck and he was all too eager to agree.

Except now, he didn't have a place to go to anymore.

They were standing at his apartment door and there was a great big notice stamped onto the middle of it. It spelled 'Eviction Notice' in thick black letters. According to the sign, he had at least a week to relocate before his stuff was officially dumped into the street.

So much for a change of luck.

He couldn't even look at Kairi at the moment. The last thing he wanted to see on her face was an expression that told him she regretted even coming along with him. This blows. And he was _so _looking forward to touching her legs.

"I suppose I can't ask you for a rain-check, huh?" he mumbled, miserably. Of course not. If he was a hot chick who was looking to have a good time, he wouldn't sleep with him either—not even out of pity. He wanted to bang his head against the door, but he was positive that would make his situation look even worse.

However, Kairi didn't seem to look the least bit bothered by this. She just shrugged. "No, it's fine. There's always my place."

And just like that, his luck shot back up again—taking his heart along with it.

He wasn't sure if he was in love or anything—having never been in love before and had only known this girl for less than five hours of his life—but he was fairly certain that this was probably what it felt like. This girl was nothing like what he'd expected, and yet completely everything he wanted and more: she was smart, sweet, beautiful, fairly easy on the eyes (not to mention, she had killer legs)—but what was more was that she didn't seem to mind being with him this way (she seemed to crave it in fact) nor did she seem think he was pathetic at all. And that was saying _a lot_.

As they approached her house—it was quite big for someone who was just living on her own—she'd grabbed him by the collar and started kissing him again; her movements had taken a slightly more aggressive tinge than before, but Roxas didn't mind. He was just as excited. Plus, it gave him an excuse to touch her legs.

They fumbled with the door—she kept trying to open it while still kissing him, but his hands were proving very distracting; they just kept grazing further and further up her legs until—well, until they both spilled through the doorway and tumbled into the floor.

Kairi's laugh was muffled against his chest and Roxas couldn't help but laugh at their clumsiness and eagerness too. He gently helped her up before pulling her in for another kiss. He heard her gasp into his mouth and hold him closer to her.

They stumbled their way in the dark, bumping into furniture and the walls a couple more times; he almost tripped on his own two feet. She was frantically trying to unbutton the buttons of his shirt as fast as she could while he busied himself with the zipper of her dress.

Just as the back of his legs hit the couch the lights turned on.

"Kairi?" came another voice.

Kairi pulled away from him almost instantly. "Riku!" she said, looking surprised.

Roxas blinked. Riku? He thought, glancing at the other boy. Roxas blinked again.

Riku was, for lack of a better word, _big_. No, he was _huge_. He completely towered over Roxas in the height category. He was also buff; his arms clearly toned and his chest well-defined—and was it just him or were those gorilla hands? He had long, silver hair and green eyes like steel, which—if they weren't so difficult to see underneath his bangs—Roxas was sure was aimed at him.

"I thought you wouldn't be home till next week," Kairi said, quietly. She was still looking surprised.

"Change of plans," said Riku coolly. He hadn't removed his eyes away from Roxas this whole time and it was becoming unnerving. "So, Kairi, care to explain what this is about?"

Who exactly was this guy? Roxas wondered. Could he be… could he be Kairi's boyfriend? Roxas felt his heart drop and his stomach start to churn unpleasantly.

"Well, Kairi?" Riku prompted.

Kairi came to her senses. "Oh, Riku—Riku, this is… this is Roxas," she said, coming around to slip her arms around Roxas's waist, giving him a squeeze—which Riku took careful note of—, "my boyfriend."

"Boyfriend?" said Roxas and Riku at the same time.

They both looked at each other—Roxas, slightly more embarrassed, and Riku, with a little more suspicion. Roxas made it a point not to make eye-contact with him for the rest of the night.

"Yup. Roxas," said Kairi, looking up at him and smiling, "this is Riku. He's my brother."

Oh. Well, that was better than the boyfriend assumption, Roxas thought, feeling relieved.

He noticed that the both of them were looking at him expectantly. Roxas cleared his throat. "Uh, hi there," he said, trying to offer a friendly smile and an outstretched hand (which he hoped pleaded peace), "It's nice to meet you."

For a second, all Riku did was stare at his hand like he didn't know what to do with it—or if whether or not he should snap it in half—and then he seemed to think twice about it altogether and offered Roxas his own. The guy had an iron-grip. Roxas winced—it felt like his fingers were losing all circulation and were about to fall off—but he rode it out anyway.

"Hi," was all Riku said before letting go. It was clear the sentiments on said meeting were completely one-sided. It wasn't nice to meet you at all.

To Riku, Kairi said, "Roxas just got evicted from his apartment so I thought he could stay here until he found a new place." When Riku failed to say anything, Kairi bit her lip, uncertain, "Please?"

It was a long while before Riku said anything, and by that time, Roxas was already deciding on whether or not it was worth staying here at all and if he should just take his chances with the eviction?

But then Riku spoke. "Fine," he said, but it didn't sound nearly too enthusiastic. "He can take the guest room."

Kairi seemed pleased enough. "C'mon," she said to Roxas, "let's go set up your room."

She tugged him along to the stairs. As Roxas passed Riku, the temperature in the room seemed to drop and it was suddenly cold—very, very cold. He couldn't help but wonder if maybe he had just painted target on his back?

By the end of the night he was quite convinced Riku didn't like him or was out to get him.

Just as soon as Kairi left the guest room to get more blankets for him, Riku had somehow magically appeared in the doorway behind him. Like he'd apparated or something.

"Hi," said Roxas, awkwardly.

"Hi," said Riku, walking into the room.

"Um…" He scratched the side of his cheek, "if you're looking for Kairi, she's downstairs."

"Actually," said Riku, his voice cool, "I was looking for you."

"Me," Roxas repeated.

"Yeah," he said. "You." He started to walk around him. "So. You and my sister, huh?"

"I guess so," said Roxas with a nod. Truthfully, he still hadn't really digested the 'boyfriend' part yet.

"Hm," said Riku, still casually, "so how did you guys meet?"

Roxas wondered if he should answer honestly or not. "We met at a bar," he said, deciding on the former.

"At a bar, how interesting," said Riku, but it didn't sound very interesting. "I didn't know Kairi went to _bars_." Roxas didn't know what to say to that, but Riku wasn't looking for an explanation. "You got kicked out of your apartment huh?"

"Uhh—"

"How did that happen by the way?"

"Well, you see, I—"

"You aren't doing anything illegal, are you?" said Riku, suspiciously.

Roxas's eyes went wide. "What? No, no, of course—"

"Taken drugs before?"

"No, unless you count Advil or Tylenol, but I—"

"Committed theft?"

"No—"

"Smoked the gong?"

"I don't smoke—"

"Impregnate a woman?"

"What? N-No!"

"Watched porn?"

"No—well, okay, _maybe_ once or twice, but that's completely norm—"

"Killed your mother?"

"I love my mo—"

"Abused animals?"

"No!"

"Hijacked a bu—"

"Okay, stop, stop, stop," said Roxas, floundering his arms in the air. "What's with the fifty questions?"

"I'm just making sure you can be trusted, that's all," he said with a shrug.

Making sure if I can be trusted with you _sister_, you mean, Roxas thought. And Riku obviously did _not_ trust him.

Maybe he should have kept his mouth shut about the porn.

They both could hear Kairi coming back up the stairs—Roxas was relieved. Riku made his way towards the door, but paused as soon as he was by the threshold.

"Oh, and one more thing," he said, airily, "if you touch my sister anywhere you're not supposed to—well," and at this he let out a dark chuckle, "let's just say you won't live long to know the rest."

Roxas knew a death-threat when he saw one, and this one was it—and judging by Riku's complete lack of facial movement, he would say he meant it.

Kairi came into the room. "Sorry, it took me awhile," she said to Roxas, who body was slowly dying a slow death inside, "I couldn't find a warm enough blanket." She noticed his odd behaviour and glanced around at Riku, "What were you two up to?"

Riku just smiled—and it looked too innocent to be real, "Just having a chat with your boyfriend," he said.

"I hope you're not bullying him or anything, Riku," said Kairi seriously.

"Not at all," said Riku. "In fact, we're already good friends, _aren't we_, Roxas?"

Kairi turned to look at him, eyes bright. "Is that true, you are?" she said.

Roxas looked from Kairi to Riku and then back again. He was so tempted to tell Kairi that her brother was a conniving nut ball who was out to get him and would likely end his life if he so much as hold her hand. But one good look at Riku's face, whose expression had changed almost immediately after Kairi's back was turned—a look that spelled worse possible dangers for him to come should he tell the truth—had him wagging his tail between his legs.

He cleared his throat. "Uh, yeah, friends—best friends in fact," said Roxas, forced cheer.

Riku's smile was back again when Kairi looked at him. "That's great, I'm glad," she said. "Well, c'mon, Roxas, let's change the sheets and get you settled in."

When Roxas glanced at the doorway, Riku was gone.

Yeah. He was out to get him alright.

There goes his luck—again.

He could hardly even allow himself to shut his eyes that night. He was too paranoid that Riku would suddenly come into the room and kill him in his sleep.

Who would have thought? The moment he finally got himself a girlfriend—a hot one at that—he wasn't even allowed to touch her, let alone sleep with her.

"I should just face it," he muttered, "I'm going to be a virgin for the rest of my life."

"Roxas?"

He looked up.

Kairi was at his doorway and—he felt his throat go dry—she was wearing a rather skimpy-looking night gown; pink silk and lace that stopped half-way up her thighs, making her long legs look even longer and enticing; nimble straps that could easily be slid off her shoulders and a low dip at the front which revealed a tantalizing portion of cleavage.

Oh wow, he thought, blinking fast because he couldn't believe what he was seeing—she wore _this _to bed?

"You're still up?" he said when he found his voice. "What are you doing here?"

"I couldn't sleep," she said and made her way to the edge of his bed. "I kept thinking about you."

Roxas swallowed. "Y-You did?"

She nodded. "What do you think of my night gown?" she asked, as she twirled in a circle—oh God, he thought and gripped the bed sheets. "It's new."

"It's… nice," he said thickly. "You look…" and at this he couldn't help but sigh, longingly, "…amazing."

Too, too amazing, he thought as his eyes did a double glance at her long, pale legs.

Her cheeks flushed red, but she looked pleased. "Thanks," she said. She brushed the blankets with the tips of her fingers, slowly making her way to his side of the bed. He watched her every move with rapture. When she was in front of him, she gave him a small, demure smile. "Do you mind?" she said, gesturing her hand at him.

Was she asking him what he _thinks _she was asking him?

"O-Oh yeah, sure," he stuttered and moved over to give her some room.

"Thanks," she said as she got into the blankets.

There was a period of silence where neither of them said anything and neither of them moved. Roxas didn't trust himself to do either. He felt so stiff he was going to explode. He was _itching_ to touch her. But that was exactly the sort of thing that would give Riku a reason to take his life, so he lay completely still.

After a few longer periods of complete silence and immobility, Kairi seemed to have gotten fed up.

"Oh, for Pete's sake, I didn't wear this stupid dress for nothing," she muttered and closed the remaining gap between them—her mouth just as hard and aggressive as before, maybe with a little touch of desperation now that both of them were alone.

Roxas gathered her in his arms, adding to the kiss with an intensity of his own he didn't quite know he was capable of.

She was warm, so very warm all over and he could feel every inch of her through the fabric of her dress. Her skin was so soft, so smooth, so hot that it literally burned him with every contact. Her hands came around his neck, dragging him closer—her mouth fiery and feasting and _urging_. He skimmed the edges of her jaw with his tongue, slowly dragging a path of wet lava onto the side of her neck, making her gasp and grip his hair so tightly it hurt while his hands came at her knees and then up her legs—high and higher until his fingers touched the lacings of her night gown. She gasped again when he tentatively dared to venture farther; she nearly tore off his arm but he held himself.

She growled when he pulled away and went back to grazing her legs. He chuckled at her evident frustration, but he wanted to prologue this as much as possible. He dipped his head and began to drag the straps of her night gown slowly down the sides of her shoulders. Once one had fallen, he pressed a sweltering kiss on the skin there, trailing lower and lower and then going back up to do the other one. She sighed, a little amused and a little annoyed that he was teasing her like this.

Kairi's hands found their way underneath his shirt, where they roamed over lean stomach and toned arms. She took him by surprise when she pulled his shirt from over his head and threw it onto the floor.

He took one good look at the article of clothing and then back at her. She was smiling, rather impishly at him while she bit on a finger.

That minx, he thought before pinning her to the mattress and kissing her senseless. The smirk he felt against his mouth told him that whatever she'd been planning was a success.

They exchanged a few more heated kisses and the amount of clothes he was wearing were steadfastly dwindling to almost nothing, before Kairi got impatient again and wrapped her legs around his waist.

Roxas let out a quiet moan at the abrupt mixture of motion and sensation upon that one contact. He braced himself above her, but just barely—Kairi kept rubbing her hips against his, making it harder and harder for him to control himself. It didn't help that she was no longer wearing any underwear beneath that dress—a sight that had nearly given him an aneurism when she'd slid it down her legs and tossed it aside—and that he could literary _feel_ her.

It was obvious that she wanted this—it was on the look on her face and the way she practically pleaded and begged—and it was more obvious that he wanted this too. But wow—he couldn't believe this was actually going to happen.

"What is it?" she whispered when she noticed his silence.

He looked at her face—her flushed cheeks, the glow of her eyes, her nightgown (which was barely on now) and her pale skin bathed in the moonlight. She was beautiful and perfect and she was all his.

"Roxas?" she said and touched his cheek.

He shook his head. "Nothing," he said. She looked unconvinced. He took her hand and pressed a kiss at her palm. "It's fine."

"Do you…" she bit her lip, "…do you want to stop?"

He couldn't help but think this to be the most absurd question in the world.

"No," he said, shaking his head again. "I was just thinking… that I've never done this before." He laughed nervously. "Pretty pathetic, huh?"

Kairi's eyes softened. "No, it's not. I've… I've never done this before yet either," she admitted, startling him.

She... really hadn't done this before? He thought, and for some reason he felt... relieved. Happy.

"But I want to," she said, raising her eyes to meet his. "With you."

Sweet damn. A beautiful girl like her wanted someone like _him_ to be the one to deflower her? Oh, he couldn't get any luckier than this, he thought.

He pushed her back down again. "Spread your legs," he whispered into her ear and she did.

He scurried his way between them and pressed against her. Kairi arched her back and gasped. Roxas braced himself again. Even though they were this close—he was so close—he didn't want to take her right away. He wanted to reignite the moment again, make her squirm and have her beg for him before finally giving her what she wanted.

He was just about to move when the sound of footsteps made them both freeze.

Oh shoot—he thought—Riku! He'd completely forgotten about him. If he caught him doing this with his sister, there was no telling if he'd even get out of there alive, let alone if he'd even live long enough to reach the door.

He got off of her even though it was, perhaps, the most difficult thing he'd ever had to do. "You should go," he whispered, voice cracked. He picked up his shirt and his pants off the ground. "Your brother might come looking for you if he doesn't find you in your room."

Kairi nodded. "Okay," she said, although he could have sworn she looked slightly put off.

No kidding, Roxas thought dryly. The high light of his evening and he couldn't even carry it to the end. This was just his luck. No amount of cold showers was ever going to rush the flow back to the rest of his body. He sighed.

She was putting on her underwear, something he couldn't help but sneak a glance at from the corner of his eye. She caught him anyway, despite how quickly he averted his eyes after she turned around. She stuck her tongue out at him, making him grin.

He led her to the doorway. He peaked through the opening to make sure the corridor was completely empty before looking back at her.

"Okay, coast is clear, I don't see him around anywhere," he whispered. "You should go now."

"Wait," she said and leaned on tipy-toes so that she could kiss him.

He immediately melted into her; snaking his arms around her waist and kissing her harder. He would have liked to throw her back onto his bed and finish what they started, but she was already pulling away, not too willingly he might add.

"Good night, Roxas," she said as she stepped away.

He swallowed, hard. "Good night, Kairi."

She gave him one last furtive look before disappearing down the end of the hall. He watched her go even long after she'd slipped back into her room.

"What are you doing up?" said a voice, making Roxas jump.

Holy shit, it was Riku. Roxas hoped he hadn't seen Kairi come from his room.

"Uhh… nothing," he lied, "I, uh, have to use the bathroom—"

Riku eyed him. "You're up to something," he said.

"What? What do you mean? I'm not up to anything—nope, nothing. I just really gotta go," Roxas babbled.

"Hm," said Riku, non-pulsed.

"Well, see ya!" said Roxas, who'd practically made a run for it.

"I'm keeping my eye on you, buddy," Riku's voice trailed down the end of the hall.

Roxas picked up his pace.

Over the next few nights, Kairi still managed to sneak into his room, and every time she came in she wore a completely different outfit.

First was the night gown—that'd been pretty hot—next was the nurse's outfit (it was slightly weird at first, but he found excellent use for the stethoscope that she had wrapped over her neck) and then there was the police-officer uniform (she'd handcuffed his hands to the railing and told him she was going to 'punish' him now for being bad).

He didn't know what it was with her and these costumes (or how she got her hands on them in the first place), but he wasn't complaining—they made every evening somewhat exciting and thrilling; he never knew what she was going to dress up as next.

Not to mention, during the day time, Kairi did all she could to make him feel especially agitated and fidgety.

SShe'd eaten a popsicle stick in front of him once; slurping her tongue over the tip and making all these gratified _sucking_ noises—it nearly drove him _mad_. She pretended she wasn't aware that he was fixed to her every move; just continued to suck away on that delicious-looking popsicle stick, lay on the innocent act for a few more minutes longer before finally looking up. Then she'd smile that sweet little smile of hers and ask him if he wanted a sip.

During dinner, she'd play footsie under the table. While she was eating her portion or having a casual conversation with him and her brother—her feet would brush up against the side of his leg in that god-awful and yet amazing way that had him dropping his fork a few times after.

And that wasn't the worst of it. The worst of it would be when he was on his way to the showers, and she'd just 'happen' to be coming out the same time he was coming in. She'd be clad in just a towel, which looked ready to come undone by the way, look mildly 'surprised' to find him there and then brush passed him again, saying nothing, and yet saying everything with just her smile.

But he couldn't touch her. Not with Riku's eyes glued to the back of his head, watching his every move. Roxas's only sanctum was at night fall, where he could touch and kiss any spot on her body he wanted.

However, every night ended with the same feeling of crushing disappointment. It seemed like every opportunity they had to be alone together or were about to enter a very crucial moment during their rather rare hours of intimacy, Riku just happened to come along or would make it a point to them that he was someplace in the house, and without a choice they'd be forced to stop.

Roxas was so sexually frustrated that he took two showers in the day instead of one. Even Kairi was getting thoroughly annoyed by her brother.

On the fourth day, however, things were unusually quiet around the house.

Roxas got out of bed and, for once during his four day stay here, he couldn't hear a second pair of footsteps walking around in the house—heck, even the feeling of murderous intent he usually felt hovering over him was no where to be sensed. It was as though the house had just been purified of all evil and vengeful entities.

The door to his room suddenly opened and Kairi slipped in. She was wearing a sailor's outfit this time—the shirt tied in a loose knot just above her midriff and her skirt too short to be properly considered a dress of any sort. On top of her head she had on a cap that said 'Captain' on the middle. It was very peculiar, but nonetheless, it had Roxas gapping and drooling after her, especially her legs. Damn, they sure were _long_ and smooth and just perfect—he could properly admire them now that he could see them clearly in the daylight.

"Oh! You're awake. Good," was all she said when she saw him standing there, and then she was kissing him, hard; arms coming around his shoulders to deepen the kiss.

It took him about… point one second to respond. He practically lifted her off the ground in his enthusiasm; her fingers bunched his hair into fists, pulling him closer. When he put her down again, Kairi's face was red and she was completely out of breath. There was something in her eyes that looked shakened up—as though she'd just drank a tank full of coffee and was now suffering from the after-affects of caffiene abuse.

"Kairi—"

She didn't let him say anything else. She just stepped close to him again and pushed him back onto the mattress. She climbed on top of him and then started to frantically pull her clothes apart. Underneath the sailor outfit was a matching sailor bra and panties.

"Kairi," he stuttered when she began undressing him too—nearly ripping off his shirt in two from her over-zealousness, "we can't—your brother—"

"He's out. We only have a few moments to spare, so let's hurry," she said just as soon as she removed his shirt.

"He's out?" he said, bewildered. From what he observed, Riku didn't go anywhere, nor did he seem to see anything passed the four corners of this house.

"Yes," said Kairi, "he got a rather… unexpected call from an old friend of his, who's in town for the day and wants to catch up."

Roxas stared at her for a minute—from the steadfast way she avoided his gaze and from the slight but evident quivering of her lips, as though she were forcing down a smile—before it finally clicked. His eyes almost bulged from their sockets.

"You mean, _you're _the one who—"

She pressed a finger to his lips to silence him. "Shhh…" she said with that same mischievous smile. "Don't jinx it."

Holy crap—he loved this girl. Roxas smiled idiotically. "…Yes, Ma'am."

"Now, what are we going to do about those pants?"

He would say it'd been a stroke of luck to have the house all to themselves, but then again, he wouldn't be Roxas if they didn't run into at least _some _problems.

They'd gotten well passed foreplay—his underwear stripped down to his legs while hers was on the verge of coming off—when the door downstairs slammed closed and Riku's voice came booming-loud and angry:

"KAIRI, YOU'RE IN BIG TROUBLE YOUNG LADY—I KNOW YOU MADE THAT CALL, SO GET DOWN HERE THIS INSTANCE!"

"No, no, no," Kairi was whispering, shaking her head. "He's back! What do we do?" She looked down at Roxas, anxiously.

"Maybe if we just—"

"Continue?" said Kairi, biting her lip. He nodded quickly. "Okay—"She began to yank her underwear down and then—

"KAIRI, I SAID GET DOWN HERE _NOW_! AND ROXAS BETTER NOT BE UP THERE WITH YOU OR I'LL—"

Roxas just groaned. He'd rather Riku kill him now than spend one more day under a cold shower.

Kairi, on the other hand, looked fed up. Or rather, she looked angry. Okay, 'pissed off as hell' was probably not the term he'd use to call the expression that was on her face.

"Oh, that's it," she said, furiously, her cheeks an angry pink, "that is _it_! I've had it with all these stupid interruptions!"

She slipped back her underwear, hopped off of him and stomped down the stairs; not caring that she was only clad in her bra and panties and that maybe Riku wouldn't precisely be thrilled with her choice of attire—or lack thereof.

Roxas was barely in his shirt and shorts by the time he'd followed her. And by then, Kairi was having a screaming fit in front of a wide-eyed Riku.

"—SO DO US A FAVOR AND LEAVE US ALONE!"

"Kairi—"Riku started.

"DON'T 'KAIRI' ME! DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG I'VE BEEN TRYING TO LOSE MY VIRGINITY, HUH? HUH?"

"Uhh—"

"WELL, LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, IT HASN'T BEEN VERY EASY WITH YOU CONSTANTLY GETTING IN THE WAY ALL THE TIME—"

"Kairi—"

"NO! RIGHT NOW I'M GOING RIGHT BACK UPSTAIRS AND HAVING THE BEST FREAKIN' SEX OF MY LIFE—AND BY GOD YOU WILL NOT RUIN IT FOR ME! 'CAUSE IF YOU DO, YOU BETTER HOPE THOSE BLOODY FEET OF YOURS RUN FAST!"

Riku just looked _stunned_. He couldn't say a thing.

Seemingly satisfied, Kairi shot him one last death-glare before turning away.

"C'mon, Roxas," she said, grabbing his hand along the way, "we're going to have sex till we can't walk anymore!"

"Uhh—"Was Roxas's rather intelligent reply, but he couldn't say anymore because Kairi was dragging him up the stairs again.

When he stole a glance back at Riku, the other boy was staring wordlessly at the spot Kairi had once occupied.

"Was she… just wearing a sailor's hat?" he said, dumbfounded.

* * *

A/N: Haha this took me the whole day to write, but it'd been worth it! This was such a fun write! Anyway, please let me know what you guys think of this!

Feedback would be great! ;)


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